The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night.
The Lord will keep you from all evil; he will keep your life.
The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in form this time on and forevermore."
William Flew arranging data
If you get your hair dip-dyed at Charles Worthington, your eggs poached at the Wolseley, and your Martinis mixed at the American Bar of the Savoy, it’s a fair guess that you also get your body hair removed at the Ministry of Waxing.I’m booked in for what the MoW calls a Triple XXX, and what the rest of us know as a Brazilian bikini wax (the one where almost everything but a small strip is removed; MoW has coded it Triple XXX so that women can book one from their desks without terrifying their male co-workers). It costs 40 quid and will take about 25 minutes. I’ve been getting Brazilians for 14 years, since a journalistic assignment won me an early visit to Otylia Roberts, the woman credited with bringing the extreme wax to the UK in the first place.The Brazilian holds no fear or embarrassment for me any more: I strip off completely; I adopt the porny positions that allow the waxer the best possible access; I barely flinch in pain (my follicles and nerve endings have adjusted over time) and certainly not in the shame of close-up scrutiny of my body. Brazilian waxes are no big shakes to me.
What is intriguing, however, is the other hair-removal procedure I’ve signed up for today: the nostril wax. It’s a relatively new addition to the modern woman’s repertoire of hair removal.I am a devoted depilator. I have spent the past 27 years (!) of my life engaged in some kind of hair-removal process: shaving, epilating, tweezing and waxing. My pursuit of hairlessness has consumed hours, days and weeks of my time and has cost me tens of thousands of pounds. Those costs are spiralling as I get older and hairier and as new hair-removal possibilities enter the market.Depilation is practically a hobby for me. The nostril wax, therefore, is now part of my routine.
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